Dear readers, I’ve got nothin’ today. Matter of fact, I haven’t written anything since Tuesday. I fear that the Rapture raptor has stolen my mojo.
Or more likely, it’s due to a lack of caffeine. Because scientific research proves that I am 74% more functional when caffeinated. And 89.5% more funny. However, I am also 36% less capable of proper grammar (more funny?).
Scientific research has also proven that caffeine + NyQuil = funniness so funny that it can’t be quantified. By the person drugged up on caffeine and cold medicine, that is. To the normal moderately caffeinated person, however, it’s just kinda weird. But I digress…
I actually had plans for a post today that was fantastically visual and informative, but it is going to have to be rescheduled because I have not yet had enough Dr Pepper to compensate for the last two caffeine-less days. Because I don’t think that Barq’s Root Beer has caffeine. And even if it does, it’s like a pansy amount, certainly not enough to sustain a Dr Pepper guzzling machine, like myself.
So, I hope that everyone has a wonderful holiday weekend full of (safe) caffeine and alcohol consumption*. And charred meat, of course. And I’ll see ya’ll next week with some fantastically informative and funny (not in that weird way) posts. There may even be a video involved. But don’t hold your breath. Because the only video taking device in my possession is my Crackberry. ‘Nuff said, right?
*If you haven’t tried Pepsi and vanilla vodka, you’re seriously missing out.